Tuesday, 23 July 2013

Museum closure



This space is currently undergoing refurbishment - we apologise for any disruption to services

The exhibits are temporarily on loan whilst the museum  area is being redecorated to reflect modurhn tastes....


Humidity control is being installed


 The museum curator is believed to have bought these two old windbreaks from a car boot for 50p each....now carefully exhibited in the bright sun all day long....!




This exhibit below used to be used by the owners as a nature table for children


Owners tries to maintain a modicum of nature in this area - mainly dead flies.















In keeping with  'authenticity' - bird seed is kept in the bird seeds tins and string is kept in the string tin....of course.  I recently donated my 'spare' string tin - just like this one but a bit faded - to local charity shop - I note that it is priced at £5 (!!!).....just in case you wish to pop along.

The 'Tin Section' is being prepared for its first viewing - scheduled opening Spring 2014


 Free ice creams for the first hundred visitors, fifty visitors, twenty visitors, ten visitors, two visitors,  visitor


PS: Queuing the night before optional

PPS: Bedding will NOT - I repeat -  will NOT be supplied (no matter how much you plead to use that nice crochet blanket you saw on my blog and tell me how lovely I am....even though I lap those compliments up!).  Ditto hot drinks and beverages in general - please bring your own and I will be enforcing the tight: 'It's a vintage Thermos' rule here. The strict 'It's Vintaajh Darhling' definition is in use this season so no trying to sneak in a 1999 Asda/Walmart/Coles/Pak'nSave (aim to please)  special please - there will be the usual vetting of the vacuum flasks at the door.  Refusal to serve often offends.....

PPPS: Toilet facilities available on request.  Deposit required!!!!!!!!!!! (Ho ho!)

PPPPS: Toilet paper  will NOT be supplied: no matter how desperado. Particular emphasis on this as last year a veritable forest was hewn to maintain the toilette habits of some punters (what is going on bloggers - or should I say loggers....?!).   Toilet plunger is available for a small deposit (extra comedic effect!).

PPPPPS: Hand washing facilities are available but please provide your own towel.  I remember the vintage ones from last year being snaffled by YOU KNOW WHO.  Funny how a very similar looking towel popped up on Ebay the following week...(she it not aware that full tracking system is in place on ALL 'Vintaajh Darhling' items....)

PPPPPPS: Please do not try and undertake a full body wash in the hand basin.  IT CANNOT COPE WITH YOUR BODY MASS.  The amount of filler that Dom had to use repairing last year's debacle is testament to THAT particular showdown.

 PPPPPPPS: Please remove all hair from the plug.  Come on people - I am NOT running a B&B here!

PPPPPPPPS:It's a dog eat dog world out there!

PPPPPPPPPS:  I notice that Crusty has 'shared' my idea that I gave out gratis on my blog only a few weeks ago (on my garden tutorial post) - mmmmm....those programme makers were VERY quick off the mark.....I am not in the slightest bit bitter...I do not have a bitter bone in my body...AHEM!

PPPPPPPPPPS:  Lovely to have all new babies in the world - makes me all teary....
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46 comments:

  1. Rainbow Vintage Home23 July 2013 at 22:16

    Oh Jenny, you are a delight...your posts always make me laugh! Thank you for the marvelously supportive comment on my blog, I feel in very good company! All kind wishes to you, I hope you are enjoying this proper summer that we are having! Rachel xxx

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 21:15

      Hello Rachel - I hope that things are little more cheery dearie for you. We all piddle in the same pot don't we!
      Best wishes
      Jenny

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  2. Catherine23 July 2013 at 22:24

    fabaroony post it made me laugh out loud! catx

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 21:15

      We aim to please!
      Best wishes and thank you for the laughs
      Jenny

      Delete
  3. Unknown23 July 2013 at 22:28

    You are obviously not right in the head, which must be why I enjoy your blog so much x

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 21:19

      Sadly even my children tell me that I am a 'bit odd and not like other mothers...' I take that as a compliment....
      Thank you for calling in
      Best wishes
      Jenny

      Delete
  4. the linen cloud23 July 2013 at 23:30

    Can't type for giggling ... you are hilarious ... Bee xx

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  5. KC'sCourt!24 July 2013 at 08:21

    I love reading you posts they really cheer me up - this one made me laugh out loud!
    Julie xxxxx

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    Replies
    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 21:32

      Glad that it added a bit of brightness
      Thank you for calling in
      Best wishes
      Jenny

      Delete
  6. Unknown24 July 2013 at 09:00

    Will you take advance bookings and can I pitch my tablecloth-tent on your front?
    Can't watch Crusty without thinking of you now. EE xx

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 21:32

      Now a tablecloth-tent that does sound like a great idea.....I will get sewing with that one!
      Best wishes
      Jenny

      Delete
  7. Anonymous24 July 2013 at 09:38

    Such fun Jenny,You always make Me LOL!
    Xxxx

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  8. Loo xx from Jumbles and Pompoms24 July 2013 at 10:25

    You are funny, Jenny. I love reading your posts and seeing your beautiful stuff er I mean exhibits - makes my day. You've reminded me that I've got a bag of large scallop shells (I think they are, retrieved from a beach in France ages ago) probably festering in our shed. I must display them...xx

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 22:04

      Thank you Loo - you are very kind - I shall look forward to seeing your scallps! Pardon!
      Best wishes
      Jenny

      Delete
  9. Plain Jane24 July 2013 at 10:38

    Oh now Mme Cootard - I would love to visit your museum but sadly my thermos is from a shop that can not be named (Tesco) and I fear that your basin may not be able to withstand my bathing habits. I do believe Crusty has been exhibiting dead flies in a picturesque vintage string tin in her latest series - where does she get her inspiration ;) Jane x

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 22:05

      I am sharply inhaling breathe this end of the wire Jane! A TESCO THERMOS - what the blazes is going on!
      I trust that you will locate a fine vintage one soon....
      Best wishes
      Jenny

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  10. Greenorchid24 July 2013 at 10:40

    Glad to see your standards aren't slipping dear Jenny!
    Loving that old table and tins... my string feels rather hard done by having to make do with an old jam jar with a hole in its lid! Cx

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 22:06

      That sounds a very good idea indeed Cass!
      Thank you for calling in
      Best wishes
      Jenny

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  11. Barbara24 July 2013 at 10:58

    Deep joy Jenny when reading your blog....as ever lovely stuff :)
    X

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 22:06

      Thank you Barbara - we are in the process of having (another) bit clear out....an endless task...
      Best wishes
      Jenny

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  12. Barbara24 July 2013 at 10:59

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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  13. The Faerie Factory24 July 2013 at 11:02

    Your posts are always so amusing. I do not own a thermos of any variety although I am small and faerie like and would probably fit in your sink and I never travel anywhere without my own toilet paper don't you know .... he he xx Who had a baby????? ~ Sarah x

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 22:08

      Phew - what a relief to hear of you own toilet paper provision - civilization will not collapse and of course your own faerie form would be fine in the sink!
      I think a few babies have been born recently - oh there goes another!
      Best wishes
      Jenny

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  14. Ashley cramp24 July 2013 at 14:48

    A post A post.....been a while?
    ... at last a good old laughing whilst belly wobbles post....!
    Can I get a season tkt and is the cafe any good....thermos (vintage) smashed last week......
    D x

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 22:09

      I have a few thermos (thermi??) lined up just let me know what colour you prefer.....
      Thank you for calling in - funnily enough my belly wobbles too and that sets the children off!
      Best wishes
      Jenny

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  15. Jo24 July 2013 at 16:43

    I am just laughing along here!...Jo x

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 22:09

      Thank you Jo - more laughs the merrier
      Best wishes
      Jenny

      Delete
  16. Anne24 July 2013 at 17:01

    I can always guarantee a giggle reading your posts Jenny! Can I just say I remember my brother having a toy ice cream van, must have been in the 60's, it brings back such memories.I wonder if that (and all their other stuff) is still in my mum and dads loft? Must have a look sometime! Enjoy your decorating Jenny X

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 22:10

      I will enjoy looking in that loft when you get a change Anne!
      Best wishes
      Jenny
      PS Decorating will be long and slow I fear

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  17. the woolly dog24 July 2013 at 18:50

    Obviously not first, so too late to claim my free ice cream. I like your jugs! I'm partial to a nice pair, especially spotty ones. (I'll get my coat)

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 22:11

      Careful Woolly Dog careful!
      Hang on there is someone at the door - it's you! Ho ho!
      Best wishes
      Jenny

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  18. Jacky24 July 2013 at 19:12

    Were you a lavatory attendant in a previous life? Sorry to hear about your spotty jugs - hope they are soon better.

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 22:12

      Oh you have found me out - I love a nice old lavatory (like the one in Carry On Screaming...) and cleaning the porcelain is a fine job.
      Very good jug joke there!
      Thank you for calling in
      Best wishes
      Jenny

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  19. Jacky24 July 2013 at 19:16

    Were you a lavatory attendant in a previous life? Sorry to hear about your spotty jugs - hope they are soon better.

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  20. GardenOfDaisies25 July 2013 at 03:15

    What perfect seashore colors these are! Blue and green and coral and sandy white. PS. I will be sure to find a vintage thermos before I arrive to tour your place. :-)

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 22:13

      Oh I do hope that you find that thermos - I would hate not to be able to let you in!
      Thank you for calling by
      Best wishes
      Jenny

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  21. Unknown25 July 2013 at 07:20

    Good Morning Jenny,good to start the day with a giggle,I do so love your posts they conjure up such wonderful images of different shaped ladies queing (?) up at your front door Beryl Cook style!I'm off to the Thursday market now TTFN Pam.

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 22:14

      I hope that you didn't buy too much at the market Pam - no surely not! Yes, I like that Beryl Cook image
      Thank you for calling in Pammo
      Best wishes
      Jenny

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  22. wendyroomcreations25 July 2013 at 14:19

    Hi Jenny, I watched dear ol' Krusty's new prog avidly to see if there was anyone wearing dark glasses, vintage mac and carrying a rather large sun umbrella. I felt sure you would have made the trip to Glasgow but either they had kept the location Top Secret or you had better things to do with your time. Somehow I think it is likely to be the latter.
    PS Having filled the "shop" with skip-cycled freebies do you think they then sold them at premium prices to all those people looking around? Philippa xx

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    1. The Custards30 July 2013 at 22:16

      Hmmm - something is not quite right in that programme. Why do people travel the length of the country for a few pallets? By the way Dom made me a picture frame out of an old pallet nearly 30 years ago and it still hangs on the wall!

      Also I WAS in the weeks episode but only very briefly...next week I aim to be in shot for much longer!
      thank you for calling in
      Best wishes
      Jenny

      Delete
  23. Annie Cholewa29 July 2013 at 15:01

    Krusty I can live without, Mme Cootard on the other hand I fear I can't ... in fact if laughter is as life extending as 'they' say then your readers will probably all live to 100 or more.

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  24. Unknown30 July 2013 at 22:37

    Ha ha ha oh bless you, your like a lovely breath of fresh air :-) good luck with all the decorating. Love those tins. Dee x

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  25. Maria31 July 2013 at 08:43

    ~ Morning, dear Jenny! Chuckling along merrily with this delightful post...~ and I may add all the comments that made me smile too! ~ We are a merry band of followers so to speak on here, aren't we just!! LOVE all your exhibits on show today! Especially the pretty wind breakers!! haha..~ Thanks for always the kindest comments too, Jenny. A visit to and from YOU always makes my day! BIG HUGS Mariax

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  26. Gillian Roe31 July 2013 at 23:44

    Like everyone I am giggling away to myself like a loon. Your blog is a gem. And your museum is filled with the most wonderful treasures. x

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